Three Years Later

Well, technically just over two years if we want to be precise.
The job I had then?
The company went into receivership and I was made redundant.
Soundwave and Harvest?
I don't want to hurt anyone's reputation including my own, so I'll just say I stopped working for them pretty much straight after I lost my job.
I worked in an adult store for 14 months working my way up to store manager before landing myself a sweet position as 2IC at an alternative store, I even became a body piercer.
I spent 8 months loving selling Hell Bunny dresses and piercing people until I started a rapid decline into depression. I loved my job and co workers, but some life events happened and all of a sudden I couldn't cope anymore.
I just wanted to be asleep, or drunk, or buried in a deep dark hole somewhere where life didn't matter.
I no longer wanted to see my friends, work, or leave the house. My favourite day would be when I was completely numb under a blanket on the sofa with my cat. Those were the better days.
I spent most of the summer in hospital and acute treatment for major depression. I'd never been hospitalised but it was the best thing for me. I got put onto new medication and will be undertaking a new treatment in the  hopes of discovering a happiness I may never have had.
I am on a journey of discovery I guess now.
I am not working due to my illness and waiting for my Income Protection to come through so I have a lot of time to ponder my life and my skills.
Definitely trying to get back into writing.....as vague and poorly written this blog post is, I'm normally pretty good at it.

Will be updating this again. I loved this little blog once. Time to bring it back to life.

Getting better all the time

I'm looking for something new.

I have a great job but I am looking to be busier.

I have to exercise more, so that is definitely something to take up my time but I am lookinf for more ways to build my experience.

I would love to manage a band or help them tour. I would like to do some promotions or basically anything music industry wise that I have learned about but haven't had a chance to put into action.

I have been putting myself out there as much as I know how to, telling people I will help them out. Offering my services for free.

I have taken over a friends job while she is overseas!

I am coming out of yet another dark slump in my life. This time I am determined to not head back there until I  have attempted to do anything in my power to achieve my somewhat blurry dreams.

This is where I am at.

Oh and also a new tattoo soon!

Life is what happens while we're making plans

It has been a long time since I posted here.

My life is very different.

I have no idea where it is going.

Guess I could fill you in.

SOUNDWAVE REVOLUTION

Soundwave Revolution was obviously cancelled. I ended up working at Counter Revolution though and had an amazing time. I also made new friends all over the country and some from on the other side of the world. The experience was everything I had hoped it would be and more. There were so many times when I felt like I should really pinch myself because I couldn't believe what I was doing and I was getting to share it with my best friends in the world so I even had someone who knew exactly what I was talking about when it was time for reminiscing.

SCHOOL

I finished school with flying colours! I think my graduation ceremony is in April next year. Yes, I am actually going to go and dress up and all that nonsense. I worked hard for my degree and went through a lot to get it. I guess I should be proud.

I also met some great people in the new class who made what could have been a very difficult experience a really lovely one and I hope I get to work with them in the future as I know they have shiny careers ahead of them.

WORK

I have a new job! Actually, the day of my final exam I received a phone call telling me I have a new job. I work at a musical instrument wholesaler! No, it isn't live music but it is a hell of a lot closer than Swedish furniture ever was.

My TATTOO

I got my first tattoo without a hitch. In fact I will post it with this blog for all to see. It needs to be touched up slightly as I knocked it when it was healing in my old job. I love it. Definately reflects how much I really like cats.

What now?

I also moved house this year. I live with my boyfriend in a tiny one bedroom flat near the city. We are slowly getting used to it just being the two of us. It is a hard adjustment but I think we are doing well. We are also making this place our own and it's starting to look really good.

I stopped seeing my psychiatrist as well. It's the second scariest thing to 'happen' to me this year. I had no idea how I would go. I still miss it. It was kind of like a little step back into my brain on a regular basis but my psych would come with me and rearrange things so they made more sense. I know that I am so far away from the person who first started seeing him and couldn't even maintain a stable thought, but it has been something that has got me through a lot and I am going to miss the security of knowing someone will be able to make it all make sense for me. Going to have to start working it out on my own.

Next year I am working for Soundwave again. Going on the full tour and looking forward to having a blast. Straight after Soundwave I am going to meet up with Mitch and his family in Bali and we are going to spend over a week in blissful relaxation.

Apart from that I really don't know what I am going to do. I still want to travel to America but I don't think the internship would be for me anymore. I also want to travel to Europe and find a job that is more live music oriented and live in a bigger flat and buy a car and lose weight and and and and......hahaha

It's pretty awesome. I don't really need to know what I'm going to do because I'm fairly content within my skin. Yes I have my superficial wants and worries. Yes I have bad days and good days.

Right now though, I'm happy being a boring 9-5er.

Lets see what this new year brings.

Thanks for reading.

Blah di blah di blaaaahhh

I'm finally in my last semester of my degree!

I received a Distinction for the class I did last semester. I have 13 weeks and two classes to pass and then I will have officially finished.

Sure, I'm going to be away on the Soundwave tour for 3 of those weeks but I know I am perfectly capable of staying on top of the work.

Tomorrow night the girls and I will get together and finally plan accommodation, we kind of chilled out once all the flights were in place so now we need to get back into thinking the situation is slightly urgent...what with it being 8 weeks away and all.

I am getting my first tattoo on Friday! I am going with one of best friends so she will be able to hold my hair back if I decide to freak out and vomit. I do however think it will go well and promise to post photos on here when it has healed. It is only going to be small but I think the mood takes me I will be inspired to have a masterpiece created on my arm but lets not let me get ahead of myself. My first tattoo is actually two small tattoos. One that means a very large amount to me and the other one means nothing. The more visible one is the one that means nothing. I have made that choice because I want something just for me. People do judge whether we like it or not and I don't want to feel the need to explain anything.

'what does your tattoo mean?'

'nothing, i just like it'

Too easy.

Well, there is my rant for now.

Thanks for reading.

UPDATE...UPDate...Update...update..

Wow, I haven't actually posted in so long.

So, what is going on...

I have been preparing to go on the whole tour for Soundwave Revolution! It's very exciting, I have a position with heaps of responsibility and I get to do it with some of my best friends!

It is more money than I have ever spent on an 'experience' before, which means that I have been working my butt off. However, this is something I really want and will be totally worth it.

To earn the money to take this adventure on, I have been working heaps. Way more than I have in my life. I have been doing 90 hour fortnights, night shift and getting very little sleep. I have no savings to show for it, but I have found out that the more I work, the more I care about my job. I have taken to helping improving the morale in my department, writing processes and procedures and other extra tasks that I don't HAVE to do but keep me interested and focused.

It looks like I will be heading to Bali next year as well! I am very excited about this as I will be using my annual leave to go ON HOLIDAY, not to study or work for free somewhere else! hahaha.

Yes, this means there is a great giant hole where my saving for interning in the USA should be. I have been thinking about it a lot. I think I still will be able to save for it and do everything else I want to do, such as Bali, Soundwave Revolution, move house and find a different job. I mean, why the hell not. I think I am just going to continue with this life and live it the way I want to.

I have given up on going out every weekend. It's weird, I missed it at first, but now I realise I can afford to have more in life than just waking up feeling like shit on a Sunday morning. It's crazy to settle down, but at the same time it means I can lead a more fulfilling and exciting life, rather than living weekend to weekend.

Oh dear.. I can't be bothered reading what I just wrote it feels THAT ranty and nonsensical....

I'll check back and fix it later...

but thanks for reading!

Sorry for the delay

New super exciting, super fun post coming soon!

Update :)

First semester is over.

I submitted all the assignments necessary (only one of them late).

I attended all but three classes (that's 10 out of 13).

I am still very nervous about failing. Coming back this year was fine. I have actually gained heaps out of going back to school for a final year and I am sure I will gain much, much more. However, if I fail this year I will not go back. I don't have it in me. I want to go to the USA, I want to continue standing on my own two feet, I want to grow up! Much to my mothers dismay I would remain at the 'nearly completed a degree' level. If I fail again I will be crushed. Last year I was crushed but I knew I had done poorly to begin with. This time I am second guessing my work because I am so scared it will happen again.

I've put on weight. Not really a big deal. Comes from the fact I have more funds available to me. I am planning to curb my junk food and spending binge as it in no way helps me meet my goals. It has been fun, but I don't want to be rich, fat and unhappy that's for sure. Just need to eat less junk food and walk to work more.

I have a new piercing. It's in the centre of my chest. It is a shiny blue gem and I love it to bits! I want more and more and more and more!

I think I'll be working at Soundwave Revolution(check it out if you dont know it http://www.soundwaverevolution.com/. That should be AMAZING but I am awaiting confirmation, so will not say anymore.

Catching up with my girlfriends (THE CREW) on Friday night. Calling All Cars have a gig at the Northcote Social Club and I cannot wait to see them again (the crew and the band). It should be a really, really fun night. The girls and I tend to go a bit crazy at CAC gigs and this should be no exception.

That's my update. Thank you to who posted the tshirt on my last blog. It's awesome! For those who didn't see it, click the following link - http://www.theshirtlist.com/no-regrets-t-shirt/